Man Arrested in Pudding Purge

Braddock, TX — A sidekick of WNWA personality and Champion The Liberal Librarian" (Joseph Paynter) turned himself in to authorities after a shopping center security guard reported seeing him naked in his Prius, performing a lewd act, police said.

But Jonathan Oliver Blair's spokeman insisted Friday that his client spilled chocolate pudding on himself and was just changing the lower portion of his "Toid" costume Thursday night. The guard told Blair to put his costume back on and get out of the truck, police said. After dressing, Blair started his truck and drove over a sidewalk, nearly hitting the guard, then drove off, police said. The guard told police that he recognized Blair as a personality on the popular and controversial television show WNWA Wrestling on OIL TV. Blair wrestles as "The Turd". The guard also told police that Blair was performing an unspecified lewd act.

Blair's spokesman, Tony Fanuci, said it was "soytenly all a misunderstanding." "Da Toid was simply a man who dumped choclate puddin all ova his ass inadvertently and was thus changing his Toid outfit. Da Toid was doing nothing wrong at all and he tawt he had sufficient privacy to remove all the precious pudding," Fanuci said.

Police said they were investigating whether to charge Blair, 42.