Being a total lard-ass led man to eat 230 Big Macs in one sitting

Being a total lard-ass led man to eat 230 Big Macs in one sitting

Pride, TX man has written book about his "joiney"

By Kimberly Ellis
Pride Post

PRIDE, TX — Fully understanding Libtown's Big Mac Daddy takes more
than sorting through every starchy towel and nudie mag inside a
roach infested shack.

Tony Fanuci, 42, hit his latest milestone when he ate his 230th Big
Mac last week. He vows to continue to eat fattening foods even when
"da ulcers start to form between [his] fat folds and ass cheeks."

But the morbidly obese Fanuci has more layers than the sandwich he adores.

It's an obsession that began May 17, 1978, when he jacked off in his
first car. Inside his shack, he has all crumbs and sweat drippings
from his fat folds. Inside his head, however, are distinct memories of
how his Obsessive-compulsive disorder mixes with numbers, dates and
facts in a way his companion monkey, Mud, just chuckles at.

"People might as well know how tings like (OCD) get stated," Fanuci
said. "I shouldn't say my parents fought a lot, but they did. My mom
was constantly abusing my pop. If he would leave the faucet on, she'd
throw scalding grease on his ass. If he left the stove buyner on, den
tings would get ugly real fuckin' fast.

"When I was really small, that is when I was 5 and only 120 pounds,
one of the first tings I rememba is Ma would say, 'Tony, ehhh...., can
you make sure, before dad gets home,.... dat the refrigerator
repairman has left da bedroom, eeeeeehhhhh?' It literally humiliated
my ass. I would go to the ba'trooms to touch myself to make sure
everything was clean as a whistle."

The bond between mother and son was so strong, that Fanuci skipped a
Big Mac the day she "gave boyth" to his half-brother Curtis Luther King
Fanuci. That was because Curtis Lowe, the father of Curtis Luther,
was hungry from smoking marijuana, and took Fanuci's sandwich.

Fanuci became fascinated with numbers before he entered school. His
mother helped him track how much money he ate every week. Now, as a
way for making up to his mother for all the money he cost her, Fanuci
became a willing slave to the Liberal Librarian at the secular-liberal
commune, Libtown.

Asked if Fanuci thinks people think he is little crazy for eating 230
Big Macs in one day, Fanuci said he doesn't care, despite the
humiliation of being constipated for a whole week. He said, "Dat
humiliation is nothing! I have been so humiliated by poyvoyts deez
last couple of yeeays dat my disgusting appetite is nuttin!!!" In fact,
tanks to all da humiliation dat I have to endoy, da best ting of da
whole fuckin' day was a couple hundred Big Macs."

"Why I oughtaaaa...."